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Exactly just just How should we interpret tales of dropping deeply in love with somebody of the gender that is surprising?

The technology of intimate fluidity

just exactly How should we interpret tales of dropping deeply in love with some body of the astonishing sex? Tales such as this: i came across myself in unknown territory when I the available man, the “figured out” guy, the unquestionably right man recognized that I became deeply in love with my friend that is best, a guy. A person I’d recognized for seven years. A person we had no time before even looked at in a way that is romantic. But, here I became, in love.

One feasible description is the individual ended up being gay or bi or pan all along, and th ag e y simply didn’t know it. But some individuals report experiencing no attraction that is previous males after which dropping deeply in love with a guy, or feeling no past attraction to females after which dropping in love with a lady. Whenever an individual happens to themselves as gay, bi, or pan, usually in retrospect they are able to find homosexual attraction in their past. This really is a kind that is different of.

Our typical presumption is the gendered facet of romantic attraction is fixed. If you’re interested in guys, it indicates you constantly had been, and also you constantly is going to be. Exactly what if intimate love is, in reality, fluid?

Lisa Diamond, a therapy researcher, features a theory of attraction. All of us come built with the biological equipment for intimate love: the set bonding system that developed in animals. Continue reading